


Flypaper

by Odaigahara



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Aromantic Morality | Patton Sanders, Curses, Gen, Love Potion/Spell, Manipulative Deceit Sanders, One-Sided Attraction, Stalking, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 06:20:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21795007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Odaigahara/pseuds/Odaigahara
Summary: "Is he a new student?" Patton asked. "I don't remember anyone telling me about a Declan before." He shook out his fingers; they were always a little numb after a lot of magic use, and he'd been practicing with flowers all morning. "Think I would'a heard of such a dashing fella by now, otherwise."Roman beamed. "I'm sure you'll hear about him soon enough. If all goes well, you'll be meeting him- asmydate to the Winter Formal."Patton tripped on the curb; Roman grabbed him before he faceplanted, and he managed to choke out, "That's- good! Really good, I'm so happy for you, um, what does Virgil think about that?"Roman blinked. "What does Virgil have to do with anything?"*Or:A new student comes to Patton's school, which wouldn't be a problem... except for how all his friends, and also the entire student body, are falling in love with him.Patton may not be the most observant student on the Magic Studies track, but he's pretty sure that isn't normal.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil & Creativity | Roman & Logic | Logan & Morality | Patton, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Morality | Patton Sanders & Deceit Sanders
Comments: 23
Kudos: 94





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [esperink](https://archiveofourown.org/users/esperink/gifts).

> So this is a gift for esperink, who asked for aro!Patton. No idea if multichap gifts are a thing people usually do, but in this case it's a lil necessary, so oh well. (esperink, if you would rather this be un-gifted, please let me know).
> 
> No TW's for this chapter.

Patton crouched in the snow and clipped the frilly purple zinnia at the base, grinning proudly at the perfect conformation of the blossom. The snow fell gently around him, coming to rest on the frosted ground and on the plant's bright green leaves. Patton felt it shudder at the cold touch and abruptly brown, shriveling to nothing and returning to the crunchy corpse it had been earlier that morning- but the bloom stayed beautifully violet. He bounced on his heels and grinned at the success.

"You know, Padre, some would call that necromancy," a warm voice said from above him.

"Roman!" Patton shot to his feet, zinnia cradled in his hand. "Hi, good morning, shouldn't you be in homeroom?" Roman grinned, rich and resplendent in a deep crimson coat. He wasn't wearing a hat over his ears even though it was cold, since he got flustered about hat hair, so his nose and cheeks were nipped red. The sight of him made love pool in Patton's heart, warm and soothing as hot chocolate. "Also, floromancy isn't like necromancy at all! It's bright, and lovely, and basically gardening." Patton stood, holding out his flower for inspection. Roman hummed appreciatively. "Doctor Trang says we should _leaf _it at that." 

Roman snorted, bumping his shoulder with Patton's. "Is this the same Doctor Trang who enchanted a cactus to shoot spines at the Dragon Witch last trimester?"

"The very same," Patton confirmed. "She's a really _orchid_-nized teacher, too."

"Okay, that one was a stretch." Roman stretched, adding a layer of pun to the joke that made Patton giggle to himself. Magic always made him a little loopy. "And no, I am _not_ languishing in homeroom, because I was distracted by the most marvelous visage I have ever set eyes on!"

Patton tilted his head inquisitively. A new student? Or maybe Roman had finally realized he _like-liked _Virgil and was coming to Patton for advice Patton wasn't qualified to give. "Oh, Roman, that's wonderful," he gushed, because Roman deserved support. "Someone we know?"

Roman shook his head, eyes sparkling. "Sadly, no- but that only adds to his air of ineffable mystery!" He swirled a finger to make Patton's zinnia float free of his hands, then grasped his wrists and twirled him around with glee. Patton went along with it, laughing. "His eyes are the warmest brown, his skin the loveliest shade of bronze, his hair as gorgeous and sleek as my own... oh, Patton, I could stare at him for days, and then he speaks and I am _lost. _Literally lost. I ran into a pillar and everything." This was the moment Patton realized that Roman's face was also red from a _scrape. _

"Roman, you should have said that first! Let me see that."

"It's nothing, it's nothing," he said, but he still leaned down so Patton could brush a thumb across his face, whispering a healing cantrip under his breath. "Nothing at all compared to the ache in my heart from _Declan's_ every word!"

"Is he a new student? I don't remember anyone telling me about a Declan before." Patton shook out his fingers; they were always a little numb after a lot of magic use, and he'd been practicing with flowers all morning. "Think I woulda heard of such a dashing fella by now, otherwise."

Roman beamed. "I'm sure you'll hear about him soon enough. If all goes well, you'll be meeting him- as _my _date to the Winter Formal."

Patton tripped on the curb; Roman grabbed him before he face-planted, and he managed to choke out, "That's- good! Really good, I'm so happy for you, um, what does Virgil think about that?"

Roman blinked. "What does Virgil have to do with anything?"

_Nothing at all except he really likes you, _Patton didn't yell, but it was a close thing. He wasn't sure how crushes worked, but he _was _sure that Virgil would be _literally _crushed if he heard this news. He hoped this Declan was worth it. 

He dreaded lunch period all through Calculus, certain that once Virgil learned of Roman's intentions something would go wrong, but his worries got sidetracked into a larger, more horrible worry as soon as second period rolled around- when Virgil flopped down on the lab seat next to him and declared, "Pat, I'm in love," with more enthusiasm than he'd shown at getting word of My Chemical Romance's reunion concert. Which was to say that he had _any _enthusiasm. Virgil was smiling like a loon, and Patton was starting to think that _he_ was going loony.

"Wow," he said, weakly supportive. "Is it a full moon or something?"

"What?"

"Nothing!" Patton scrambled for a pun and came up empty-handed. "Um, with what... person... who is it?"

The same dreamy, horrible smile drifted across Virgil's face, out of place like a unicorn in a haunted house. Patton suspected that unicorn of foul deeds. That unicorn was _far from innocent. _"His name is Derek," he said, resting his chin on his hand, "and he's the most wonderful boy I've ever seen. I'm going to ask him to the Winter Formal."

"O-kay," Patton said, "that's great! It's your life, and you get to decide what to do with it even if you're acting weird. It's a good thing that you're feeling more assertive," trying to convince himself as much as Virgil, "but, um, have you taken any drinks from anyone recently, or had any weird spell malfunctions?" 'Cause Roman was romantic as heck, but Virgil had been stuck on Roman for a _year _now. And he was _stubborn. _Patton had taken five months to be friends with him for real, and that had been in sixth grade!

"No," Virgil said, but his shoulders tensed. "Is- is there someone drugging people who we need to watch out for? I mean- holy shit, what if they go after freshmen? Patton they're basically _larvae- _what if they go after _Princey, _he's a _moron_-"

"Yes! Roman! Let's talk about him!" Patton exclaimed. "How is he? Have you seen him today?"

"Yeah, he's fine, I guess?" Virgil scrunched up his nose. "Haven't seen him today. You know I don't have any classes with him until after lunch."

"Right," Patton said, at a loss. "Do you- I mean, do you still-"

"Do I still what?" Virgil asked, frowning. "Are you okay, Pat? You seem kind of pale. You're not sick, are you?"

"Definitely not sick," Patton said weakly. "Just wanted to ask if you still like Roman."

"Oh." Virgil shrugged. "Sure. He's nice enough. We're friends. Why, did he do something weird?"

"No?" Patton tried, nerves ratcheting up, but then the teacher walked in, a whole fifteen minutes late, and Virgil turned his attention to the board. Patton stared at him helplessly, biting his lip. Probably it wasn't anything, right? Roman fell in eternal love all the time, and Virgil sometimes got fixated on things, and even if _he_ knew they loved each other, that didn't give him the right to interfere in their relationship. Virgil might have moved on! Roman might never have liked Virgil in the first place! Shouldn't he have been happy for them? Positive feelings made people healthier, reduced stress, and increased magical output. His friends deserved to be happy. 

Except Virgil never smiled this much, and Roman usually took more than a day to decide he really liked someone. And Patton had been hearing an unusual amount of giggling in the halls. 

His chest clenched. He looked down at his paper and realized he'd been drawing little spiraling scribbles instead of notes. 

*

Logan squinted at the flowers on the cafeteria table. His eyes flashed electric blue as an analytical spell working through the matrices etched into his glasses. "Very good, Patton. You've improved immensely since last trimester." 

Patton beamed; he'd thought so, but Logan's opinion, both as his occasional tutor and his best friend, meant the world when it came to arcane expertise. And also most expertise. Logan had approximate knowledge of many things. "Thanks, Lo-Lo. Also, I had another question on a more important topic? If you don't mind doing a little check for me?"

"Of course," Logan said, drawing his eyes back from his textbook. His dark hair was mussed from sleeping in the library before the school day had started, one cheek red from resting his face on his hand. "What do you need?"

Patton frowned. Was Logan following his own sleep schedule? He'd have to ask after this problem got sorted out. "When Virgil comes over here, can you check if there's any spells on him?"

Logan sat up straighter. "Any _spells?_ Patton, is something wrong? Have you checked for malevolent influences? Or- no, I don't suppose that would work, given his specialty, but if he's finally gotten possessed because of his ridiculous refusal to banish _anything-"_

"Virgil can whisper how he wants and we should support him," Patton said on reflex.

Logan leveled an unimpressed look over his glasses. "Unless our teachers' allowance of negligent summoning practices has finally led to a disaster more impactful than a laid back _poltergeist_."

"The poltergeist wasn't a disaster! Andy's his great-great-uncle."

"Yes, and the resemblance is alarming, but that's not the point. If Virgil's been possessed at last-"

"Who's possessed?" Virgil asked, dropping his tray onto the table and making Patton shriek in surprise. He startled and glanced from Logan to Patton, rigid and wide-eyed. "Is someone possessed? Do we need an exorcism, because I can do that right now if you let me get my bag-"

"Virgil. Breathe." Virgil's shoulders moved up and down. Logan nodded approvingly. "Thank you. Could you look at me for one moment?" He jerked his head up and met Logan's eyes, and a jolt of energy passed over the table, making all three of them shiver in their seats. Virgil winced back and rubbed his eyes. "He's fine, Patton. Just stressed."

"No shit, Sherlock, I'm always stressed," Virgil snapped. "What was that?"

"Nothing at all to do with Sherlock Holmes, much as I might wish otherwise." Logan turned his attention back to his book. "Patton thought you might have been influenced by an external force."

"What?" Virgil looked indignant. "Hold on. You thought _I-"_

"So what do you think of Declan? Or whatever his name is?" Patton burst out, and Virgil's face went from betrayed to besotted. It was like a metamorphosis. Logan stared.

"His name is Derek," their friend said, alight with passion. "He's the most wonderful boy in the world. I've never met _anyone _like him, Pat, not even Roman. He looks at me and it's like all my troubles melt away."

"Is that so?" Logan asked intently. "I believe I met someone like that today, as well."

_Oh god. _"That's so great!" Patton forced out. "How'd you meet him, Verge?"

Virgil said dreamily, "He said hi to me in the hall," then jolted upright in his seat, staring across the room like he'd heard a _really _loud ghost, and said lowly, "He's sitting down right now. Just look at him. He's so _majestic_." Patton followed his gaze and noticed for the first time that the cafeteria wasn't filling up like normal at all. Instead, like ripples in a pond, the students were filing into the room and centering their attention around one point. The crowd parted, and beside him Logan sucked in a sharp breath. 

In the center of the largest table in the cafeteria, surrounded by other students, sat a boy in a black and yellow jacket. His skin might have resembled bronze, and his eyes might have been a nice shade of brown, but his posture was... _off, _somehow. He was leaning back in his seat like a king greeting petitioners, waving off approaching admirers- but his shoulders were stiff, his movements forced and his gestures sharp. He didn't seem familiar. Patton couldn't imagine any reason for Logan to look so captivated except for the obvious. Gosh, he hoped he was overreacting. "Um. Logan?" Patton asked a little desperately, "Do you know who that is?"

Whatever was happening, it wasn't enough to distract Logan from dispensing information on request. "Yes, he's in my Advanced Alchemy class. He introduced himself to me as Dolos."

"As _Dollhouse?" _

"_Dolos,"_ Logan corrected absently. "I believe it's the name of some sort of spirit. His parents must be traditionalists." He smiled, the grin incongruously bright on his face. "Patton, don't you wonder how much he might _know? _And his eyes are such a lovely shade of gold."

"I thought they were brown," Patton said weakly. That was three weird crushes at once, all of them focused on the same person. "Do you know where Roman is? He's usually here by now."

"No idea," Virgil said, "but something's going on by the hall." He and Logan jerked their gazes over to the double doors like dogs catching a scent. A bad feeling started to build in Patton's gut.

A triumphant fanfare blared from the doors, played by two freshmen he vaguely recognized from the marching band. They stood at either side of the double doors with trumpets, in full uniform except they were covered in glitter; a third student strode ahead with blushing determination, scattering rose petals in a path to the new kid's table. The entire room stilled and went silent. Patton wondered, face heating, if this was how people felt when they saw a tornado on the horizon. 

Logan slammed his pen down on the table. "Of course," he muttered under his breath. "How-" He rummaged for a notecard- "_unbearably_ extra of him."

"Hold on," Virgil whispered, "you don't mean-"

"Of course I do," Logan hissed, "who else would do something so ostentatious?"

"We have to stop him," Patton shrilled under his breath, but it was too late. Two more freshmen (where had he _gotten_ all of them?) had already pulled the double doors open in an explosion of golden sparkles, letting Roman strut proudly through as magic molded them into butterflies that fluttered around the room. One of the kids by the doors summoned an instrument case and pulled out a violin. The student body turned towards him, pulled away from their new idol by Roman's dramatic gravity. 

The new kid tilted his head. The freshman drew her bow across the strings. Patton was already hiding his face by the time Roman puffed out his chest and started to sing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patton's not sure this is how crushes work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW's at end notes!
> 
> Not beta read bc it's so short and I honestly just found the draft XD If you see a typo, pls let me know, though

Roman's face was smushed into the comforter. Virgil propped an elbow on his back, leaning over him to squint at the TV screen; Logan, practical as ever, deposited Roman's dirty clothes in the hamper, rolled his desk chair over to the spot they'd been occupying, and positioned himself for the 'objectively' clearest view. Patton, lost for anything else to do, made cookies, ate eleven of them in one sitting, and sat contemplating a twelfth.

A twelfth cookie would be too much. He shouldn't, it was bad for him, but worse was the cold, devastated feeling in his chest, empathy in overdrive. He stuffed the cookie into his mouth and closed his eyes, chocolate chips melting on his tongue, and the ache faded a little. Not completely, because Roman was still upset, but he hadn't expected it to. Roman's feelings of rejection were sad and important.

Even if they _were_ going on long enough to be funny.

"But I did everything right!" Roman wailed on cue, flopping onto his back and shoving Virgil cursing onto the floor. On screen, Yoshi jerked at the wheel and plunged off a bouncy mushroom into darkness. "I hit that high C_\- _Patton, _you _heard- and I bribed like six band kids, and bought so many _fucking _roses- where did I go wrong?I thought he liked me!"

"Maybe he liked someone else better," Virgil grumbled, elbowing his way back onto the bed. Roman smothered his next words with a pillow; he flailed and dragged it off his face, then snapped, "Someone who wouldn't embarrass him in front of the entire school! He probably hates you now."

"Virgil!" Patton scolded, but Roman's face had already paled. 

"Oh, oh _no, _and of course he'd be perfectly reasonable to do so, I've ruined _everything- _I'll have to repent! To prove my worth-"

"Be reasonable," Logan said, placing his Joy-Con on the desk beside him and spinning around. "Dolos already saw us scrape Roman's ashes off the floor after that truly _phenomenal _burn. It's more likely that he knows we're associated and has chosen to hate us all."

"I'm sure that's not true," Patton said hurriedly, seeing Virgil's eyes go wide and fearful. "He hasn't known us long enough to hate any of us! And Roman, you gave a very nice performance. Some people just have different tastes, is all. I'm sure it hasn't ruined your chances."

"Bet," Virgil muttered. Patton shot him a Look. "What? You saw how he responded. There's no coming back from that. Sorry, Princey, but your romantic intentions are _fucked_."

"Language," Patton huffed, and Virgil shrugged, sullen. "I think we need to change topics," he decided, because Roman was already looking worse, Logan getting that look that meant he was seconds from bursting into an argument with how much smarter and better than them he was. Best to head that off before the biggest heads in the room started fighting. "Roman, do you know how you're specializing yet?"

Roman leaped to his feet so fast that Virgil hissed, apparently purely in shock. "Why, yes I have! In fact-"

"Effects," Logan said.

Roman snapped, "As a matter of fact, I'm specializing in Illusions. Not that it will help with your illusions of grandeur."

"Illusions is literally a subset of Effects," Logan said. "That's like saying a rectangle isn't a geometric figure."

"Roman, that's amazing!" Patton gushed to get them back on track. "Does that mean you can be like Gandalf?"

"Oh, please, much more than _fire works _for me." He grinned at his own pun, and Patton clapped. "Thank you, thank you- would you like a demonstration?"

"More than your butterflies?" Virgil asked, but he was already turning around in interest. "Sure, hit us."

"Actually, it would be preferable that you not physically assault us," Logan said, "but a demonstration of your talents would be pleasing."

Roman gave a broad smile and stood up, taking a deep bow. "Are you prepared, then, for the show of a lifetime?"

"This is about to turn into a Lifetime movie if you don't get going, Princey."

"Look, Necronomi-yawn, illusions are an art. The ultimate form of stagecraft, the best and greatest style of showmanship, guaranteed to amaze any from ages one to ninety-three! Perhaps even ninety-four-year-olds, if they're spry enough. Though really it would impress anyone with working sight and hearing, and I'm not certain of the statistics on when age-related loss of senses usually occurs, nor am I sure when babies gain enough depth perception to be fooled by illusions in the first place-"

"At five months."

"Thank you, Specs, and prepare for a Specs-tacle! You see-" Roman flourished a hand, and the room vanished in a waterfall of colors, streams of pink-red-orange cascading in ribbons that fell from the ceiling to the floor. Above them was an endless creamsicle sky, below them were clouds and at the edge, between them and Roman, was a long, long drop to a misty city below. They were standing on clouds in a psychedelic sunset, so close to the edge that they were about to plummet, and even the air felt thinner. Patton felt a thread of vertigo and made himself lean over the side of the bed. "We're starting out on Cloud Nine."

"Holy shit," Virgil breathed, scrambling back on the bed.

Logan's eyes flashed blue, and he perked up. "The detail is incredible. Did you really assemble this by segment?"

"Cubes of about an inch," Roman said, going pink with delight. "And you would not _believe _how hard it was to get the air right." He bounced on his heels. "Would you like to see more? Not that you have to, of course, but I think it's quite delightful-"

"I wanna go to the city!" Patton burst out, awed. "Or see more in general, if you haven't gotten to urban planning yet, but I think this is amazing! You're so talented, Roman."

Roman grinned, and Virgil flushed under his foundation. Patton knew he did because the tips of his ears went red. No one ever remembered to put makeup on the tips of their ears. A real ov-_ear_-sight! "I do like to think so." The skyscape shifted, zooming in closer to the city, and Patton gasped in delight: the details might have been choppy or blurred, not planned except for an outline, but Roman had gone all out on the architecture. Patton didn't know a lot about buildings, but he did know about gargoyles and flying buttresses and cathedrals, and Roman's misty city was full to the brim with those. The air even smelled like dampened dust and stone.

The illusion faded, letting in sound and light from the real world in increments like a glitching video game. Patton blinked to clear his vision, eyes spotty with Gothic afterimages, and Virgil said, grudgingly, "Okay, that was cool. Creepy at the end, but cool."

"Perhaps I was thinking of you while I created it," Roman sniffed, then paused, grinned weirdly, and added, "Or of Declan. Derek? I'm not sure what name he's actually using, now that I think of it."

"Does it matter? The guy's so pretty he can ask us to call him Zoosmell and we'd fall over ourselves for the privilege," Virgil sighed, less irritated and more dreamy than he had any right to be. "You think he'd come over if we invited him?"

"Not after Roman's ill-fated performance, and likely not even if that hadn't occurred," Logan snipped out. "Considering the attention he receives from everyone at school, why would we be the foremost choice?"

"I'll just have to woo him more passionately," Roman declared, and the sick feeling in Patton's gut grew too much to ignore.

"Maybe y- we could just let him be for a few days?" he suggested, not sure why he felt so uneasy. It was good to see his friends happy. He loved when they were happy, and this crush made them happy; it wasn't like it harmed anyone just talking about someone, did it? People talked about people all the time, especially if they were nice or pretty. But the look in Logan's eyes, sharp and fascinated like he was staring into a nebula-- in Roman's, like he'd met a fairy tale prince in real life-- in Virgil's, like he'd stopped being anxious and started, started _coveting _instead--

Virgil wasn't enchanted. Logan had said he came back clean. Patton shouldn't have been doubting him, not when he was so close to failing half of his courses himself. For all he knew, this was a normal magic thing that he didn't get yet, like how he didn't get Transmutation or the details of Animal Summoning. Just some common knowledge that had skipped him right over. "He could be dating someone already, if he's so handsome and smart," Patton continued hopefully, "and then it'd be rude to keep throwing flowers at him, wouldn't it? It might put him more on his _garden_."

"That one was pretty weak," Virgil said, "but I guess I can see your point."

"What if whoever he's dating isn't good for him?" Roman blurted, and Logan nodded in sharp agreement. "I could do so much better than _Brent _or god forbid, Kieran--"

"What is _with_ your beef with Kieran."

"He knows what he did! That's not the point! The point is, what if Dollhouse- Dolorous- Dante?" Roman frowned. "What if this beauty with the warmest brown eyes since our dear Patton's is being mistreated in some way?"

"His eyes are gold," Logan said, at the same time Virgil snapped, "They're _green_."

"I think that's a pretty big leap," Patton said tentatively. "You know what they say about assumptions, kiddo."

"That they must be recorded along with conclusions when making statistical reports or inferences, or your data may be skewed; yes, Patton, everyone knows this." Patton took a deep, steadying breath. Logan continued, "If we wish to know his name or romantic status, I do not see why we wouldn't simply go up and ask him. Surely we would have heard by now if he had accepted someone's invitation to the Winter Formal, for instance."

Patton said, "I thought we were all going as friends."

"It's true that the groupchat hasn't yet reacted as though we'd all simultaneously experienced a power outage," Roman said contemplatively. Patton tried his best not to think about being ignored. "Perhaps there is still a chance. But should we draw lots or create a competition to see which of us should shoot our shot--"

"We should all try and be supportive in our own ways," Patton burst in, "and definitely _not _decide to focus on Dorian for the rest of the day!"

"Who else would we focus on?" Virgil asked blankly.

Patton buried his nervousness with the rest of his negative feelings and suggested, "More Mario Kart?"

It worked, for a little bit. He got the feeling the effect would return as soon they went back to school and caught another glimpse of their new shared crush, though.

Not a spell on Virgil specifically, Logan had said. Patton worried at his lip until it bled, only stopping when Virgil started giving him nervous glances, and wondered if maybe he should ask Logan to examine the new kid instead, or if that would be more dangerous than helpful.

Patton could think of a lot of reasons to bewitch a whole school to love you. None of them were good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: mention/implication of magical manipulation of romantic feelings


End file.
